FASHION IS MY LOVE LANGUAGE.
There are 5 Love Languages, but Fashion is mine. Just like words of affirmation, I value compliments, praise, and encouragement on the looks I style. Like quality time, I enjoy watching movies and shows and giving the costume design my full attention. Like physical touch, I like playing with various textures and fabrics in one look. Like acts of service, I appreciate when dresses have pockets to help ease my load of holding things. Just like receiving gifts, I feel special when people buy me clothing items or point out things that remind them of me and my style. If that doesn’t explain my relationship with fashion then I’d tell you that fashion is the love of my life. I've never loved something as much as I love fashion. I eat, breathe, and sleep fashion, and I have been since I was young(er).
I am the oldest girl of 3 (2 younger brothers). I was 5 years old when my first brother was born. My father was in and out of jail since I was 2 years old so I was raised by my mom and additionally my father's parents/my grandparents.
I never really watched kid shows when I was younger because my mom would only watch her shows. I vividly remember cuddling on the couch with my mom to watch Girlfriends and Sex and the City as a kid. I didn't fully understand the storylines, but I loved seeing what the characters wore in every episode --- and I knew even then that Mr.Big was an a**hole. One of my favorite movies of all time is DreamGirls, my mom bought it on DVD for me one Christmas and would force me to remove it from the DVD player and beg me not to watch it every day. but I was totally obsessed. the music, the acting, the fashion, and of course beyonce. I dreamed of one day wearing that mermaid fishtail gown that the dreamgirls wore during their solo act debut. the silhouette, the gloves, the fit, and the way it moved when they moved, are ingrained into my mind. looking back on all of my favorite things as a child, making the person I am today make so much sense, it also made me feel like everything that makes me into the woman I am is because of my mom.
She allowed me to be one of those kids who were simply themselves, no matter how embarrassing it was when I’d leave the house in my pink ladybug rain boots, a tutu, and rainbow-striped stockings. ONE THING I ADMIRE ABOUT HER IS THAT after she had me at 18, she didn't allow herself to get lost in motherhood and that ULTIMATELY allowed me to be myself as well. Even after my brothers were born, I used to love watching my mom get dressed to go out with her friends, I wasn't one of those kids who cried when their parents left, because I plotted on playing in her heels after she was gone. My mom was one of those parents who bought new outfits for every holiday. In elementary school it was really bad, she'd have me and my brothers in every holiday-themed shirt from Children’s Place, if they sold Martin Luther King Jr. shirts for MLK Day I’m sure we'd have one of those too. My mom always centered holidays and big events around fashion, it was kind of like our family tradition. In school when things like light-up shoes, jackets, and book bags were popular I'd come home and ask my mom to buy me things everyone at school had and she'd always say "No, you only want it because you see everyone at school have it." Then she'd buy me something totally different, I'd go to school the next day and everyone would compliment me on it. MY STYLE WAS SO different compared to my peers at school. Looking back, I think my mom was very intentional in making sure I was a leader and not a follower.
As a kid fashion felt like an escape, it gave me pure joy. Playing dress up wasn't a game to me, it was serious. It was something about the heels and the dresses or sheets made into dresses that gave me a different attitude and sass. I'd put on heels and get dressed like I watched my mom do, then act like I was going out with my homegirls. To this day I feel like I gain confidence and different attitudes depending on what I'm wearing. Some OUTFITS make me feel like myself and give me a sense of identity, some make me feel like a superstar, or a movie star, or an art teacher, or someone who lives on a beach in Malibu.
Fashion has always been my love language, connecting me to my identity, my family, and my aspirations. It’s been more than an escape —it’s been a way to see myself in every role, every era, and every woman.
